Myth: ‘Back to school month is a breeze for single parents.’
A lot of people associate September with new beginnings and fresh starts and a collective sigh of relief as children go back to school and routines can get back up and running again. But for single parents, September can in fact be one of the most stressful times of the year. First of all, you may be arriving into the month feeling completely drained after a summer of trying to juggle work, childcare, holidays and everything in between. And then with energy levels at an all time low, you need to navigate the back to school transitions and all the practical and emotional needs that demands of you. We can then start adding even more to the mounting pressure as we tell ourselves all the things we should be doing, falling into the trap of comparing ourselves to others and thinking we need to prove we have got all this covered: when the reality is far from it. On top of all of this, September also has a way of magnifying our single parents status as you see what appear to be happy families bounding into school or nursery after a summer together and feeling like you and your family just don’t fit. You may be stressing yourself out wondering when and how you explain your family set up to the new parents at school or worry that the other parents are talking about you, speculating about what your situation is. So if this is you this September, the first thing I want you to do is pause and recognise all that is going on for you this month, from new schools to routines to mounting pressures at work. With this in mind, ask yourself what actually needs your attention right now, doing this can help you leap frog all those shoulds and trying to match up to others and bring you back to you and your family’s needs and prioritise what really matters. September may be branded as a time for new starts and new routines but what if instead we consider it as a time to pause after an intense summer period and focus only on the things that truly matter for you and your family this month. Look inwards this September and remind yourself how much you’ve carried over the summer, and how much is still on your plate. Big goals, clean start? That can wait until the dust settles. Take it easy on yourself this month and take small steps forward toward a brighter future for you and your children. I work with single parents at all stages of their journeys to help them build a life they love. If you want to know more, I’d love to hear from you.
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